Effective communication is not restricted to only a full comprehension of the encoded and decoded messages one receives or transmits. It is also very much related to the environment and culture of the community. The short encounter below illustrates my experience in ineffective communication.
Previously when I was still studying in my home country, Malaysia, I did not encounter, or rather, was unaware of any instances where there was a communication breakdown. I was completely at ease interacting with different people, albeit living in a multiracial community. However, when I first came to Singapore, I thought I wouldn't have many problems either, given that both countries have rather similar cultural backgrounds. The confidence was largely due to the fact that I am competent in the English language, which happens to be the primary language used. Nevertheless, although I do not face any problem in understanding my lectures or any academic related materials, I have quite a few problems with the people I meet and live with in hall. Living in a community with residents hailing from various countries, effective communication is crucial to avoid misunderstandings.
During the last summer vacation, I headed the hall freshmen orientation programmes department and had to work with a large committee. We did not have difficulties understanding instructions, but we had troubles working harmoniously at times. This is because we have very different principles. I was insistent in not being frivolous while working, but some were more at ease taking things easily and enjoying frequent breaks in between work. I was very frustrated at the progress of our work. In the end, we simply had to compromise to make things work. Luckily enough, the programmes went smoothly.
What I learnt from this experience is that people adopt different principles. We simply have to respect that and find a common ground to work things out. Communication is not just transferring and receiving data, but also taking into account the different backgrounds.
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| King Edward VII Hall Welcoming and Orientation Committee |
Hi Png Ning, I am absolutely empathetic with the situation you were in and like your sentence on "We simply have to respect that and find a common ground to work things out". With so many people of different cultural background in NUS, it is important that we learn to work together. Even after we graduate, we will get to work with different people with a huge variety of attitudes and habits.
ReplyDeleteIt is always when the going gets tough, the tough gets going. I am glad you pulled it through!
Hey! I definitely sympathize with you,it feels so lousy and unrewarding sometimes being the one to push for work being done, while everyone else is taking it easy, especially when you are the in a position of leadership. Well it was summer vacation after all, so i guess taking that into account, everyone just wanted to have fun.
ReplyDeleteBeing effective at communicating "bad news" like work objectives and instructions requires lots of practice and tinkering, because it's not just 'WHAT you say', but 'WHEN you say it' also makes a huge difference.
Glad you managed to push things through eventually.Just hope all that frustration didn't spoil your vacation!
My first thoughts is that communication is not related to "principles". Most of us do not share the exact same principles in life and more often than not, this leads to disagreements and in your case, frustration too. Communication failed in this scenerio. You did not communicate your intentions clearly nor did your team members relate their goals to you. Yes, from the start, principles were different, but understanding each other via proper communication would have helped easing tensions.
ReplyDeleteNing, This is a very clear and well-focused discussion. I like the way that you hone in on a specific situation in your NUS hall experience and on your role as the freshmen orientation program head. You also focus on one particular issue, the idea that some of your co-workers had a more "frivolous" approach than you did. To make this even clearer, you might have added one specific example to illustrate.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I'm not sure if the word "principles" is correct in describing the varying perspectives though. Perhaps you could have used the idea of varying "norms." As you'll note when we discuss intercultural communication, groups generally share norms, or unspoken rules, and those may differ across cultures. (That's one reason why I present "rubrics" for the assignments in this course; so everyone knows what my expectation are.)
That said, you develop your ideas very cohesively here, and you've presented a fine example of how you need to refine your own comm skills in the specific area of adjusting your expectations relative to varying norms.
Thanks for the very good effort!
Dear Christopher,
ReplyDeleteThanks for your input. I really appreciate it. It is important to learn how to communicate with others, especially in this era where globalisation is evident. Thanks again and have a wonderful weekend.
Dear Eric,
Thanks for a very interesting comment. I would like to say that I'm very bad in breaking 'bad' news because I don't quite know how to break it softly. I always do it bluntly. I hope Brad teaches us how to do it nicely :) By the way, a friend of mine who was also in the committee told me that I sent out some really bad vibes during meetings. I suppose I shouldn't have let my impatience and frustration show on my face. I'll remember to handle things differently next time. Thanks again and enjoy your Sunday.
Dear Lance,
I think I agree with Brad that it should be 'norms' rather than ' principles'. Nevertheless, I think communication has everything to do with 'norms', at least in this case. I believe that having to deal with how people work is also part of the package. We may not like how a person does things, but we would have to find a way to tell him about it. By the way, I don't think communication failed between me and my friends because we clearly understood the circumstances. It was simply the fact that we all thought our way was better than the other's. Anyway, thanks a lot for your input. I hope you'll have a great weekend.
Dear Brad,
Thanks for the lovely comments. I'll keep them in mind. I look forward to our class discussion on intercultural communication. It sounds interesting and I might have some insights to share since I have been living in a multicultural community my whole life.
Have a wonderful weekend.
Hi!I wanted to let you know that I really enjoy your story that day too!It's a great pleasure to talk with you!
ReplyDeleteI think you're a smart and hard working girl.Though working for hall sometimes maybe difficult,I believe you can handle all the things well!
Cheers:)
Really interesting..Do you feel that before beginning a communication ,one should understand the receiver's psychology?
ReplyDelete